Via Fail Blog.
Showing posts with label panda sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label panda sex. Show all posts
08 December 2012
27 September 2012
Why pandas have pregnancy problems
In case this conundrum has been weighing on your mind, Mental_Floss has the answers.
19 May 2012
20 March 2012
If Lynx can make pandas have sex it can certainly help in your quest
Lynx, the non-American version of Axe Body Spray, is promoting its product through copulating pandas. Ohhhh yeah. Let the sexy times begin.
Via Copyranter.
02 March 2011
24 December 2010
Will it now?
(703): He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
14 April 2010
poor pandas. at least there's not an F-.
maria brings our attention to this jezebel article about our poorly rated pandas. the animal review rates animals on the basis of survival instincts and general radditys (real word i made up). on a grading scale of A to F, our pandas scored a very nice F. hopefully it was at least a high F.
24 December 2009
06 November 2009
if you don't read texts from last night
please start.
the few days following halloween were ripe with gems.
including this one:
"(720): I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands..."
the few days following halloween were ripe with gems.
including this one:
"(720): I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands..."
16 September 2009
a very fascinating read (for more than just this excerpt!)
from bonk by the always entertaining mary roach:
"Perhaps the only locality where Viagra has proved a disappointment is the Wolong Nature Reserve in Sichuan Province. Wolong is home to part of China's dwindling panda population, as well as a group of captive pandas in a breeding research facility. Pandas have trouble reproducing in captivity. Some researchers describe it as a libido issue; some 60 percent of captive pandas show no interest in mating. Others seem to think that the males have erectile deficiencies, for in 2002, a middle-aged panda named Zhuang Zhuang was dosed with Viagra. 'No result on him at all,' the BBC quoted Wolong deputy director Wang Pengyan as saying.
Wolong researcher Guo Feng, also quoted in the BBC piece, took issue with his colleague. 'You can't say Viagra has no results on pandas. That panda basically has no capability. In the last few years, we've given Zhuang Zhuang many chances but he simply can't do it.'
It was unfair to single out Zhuang Zhuang, for male pandas in general are bumbling lovers. 'The male giant pandas do not know where to put it,' a zoologist named Chen is quoted as saying in Inside China Today. 'Sometimes they climb on the females' heads and start pushing.' Seeking to enlighten clueless male pandas, Wolong staff set about making an instructional video, which the media gleefully dubbed 'panda porn.' The BBC even referred to the footage as 'explicit,' though given the animal's thick fur and diminutive penis*--erect, about as big as a man's thumb--it's hard to imagine that the pandas were able to glean much detail from the tapes. Likely more of a This End Up sort of deal. The staff tersely reported 'improvement.'
*A fact that has spread well beyond the confines of panda reserves. The Urban Dictionary includes an entry for 'panda penis' (meaning a small one) submitted by a contributer named Lew. Lew's usage example reads: 'That girl said Matthew Reed had a panda penis.' It is Urban Dictionary policy to reject definitions that include the full names of non-celebrities, leading one to assume that the panda slur was directed at some sports or entertainment figured named Matthew Reed, and not Matthew Reed the wedding photographer, or Matthew Reed the assistant professors with the research interest in the interaction of quinoid compounds with cellular macromolecules, or any of the thousands of other 'Matthew Reeds' on Google."
"Perhaps the only locality where Viagra has proved a disappointment is the Wolong Nature Reserve in Sichuan Province. Wolong is home to part of China's dwindling panda population, as well as a group of captive pandas in a breeding research facility. Pandas have trouble reproducing in captivity. Some researchers describe it as a libido issue; some 60 percent of captive pandas show no interest in mating. Others seem to think that the males have erectile deficiencies, for in 2002, a middle-aged panda named Zhuang Zhuang was dosed with Viagra. 'No result on him at all,' the BBC quoted Wolong deputy director Wang Pengyan as saying.
Wolong researcher Guo Feng, also quoted in the BBC piece, took issue with his colleague. 'You can't say Viagra has no results on pandas. That panda basically has no capability. In the last few years, we've given Zhuang Zhuang many chances but he simply can't do it.'
It was unfair to single out Zhuang Zhuang, for male pandas in general are bumbling lovers. 'The male giant pandas do not know where to put it,' a zoologist named Chen is quoted as saying in Inside China Today. 'Sometimes they climb on the females' heads and start pushing.' Seeking to enlighten clueless male pandas, Wolong staff set about making an instructional video, which the media gleefully dubbed 'panda porn.' The BBC even referred to the footage as 'explicit,' though given the animal's thick fur and diminutive penis*--erect, about as big as a man's thumb--it's hard to imagine that the pandas were able to glean much detail from the tapes. Likely more of a This End Up sort of deal. The staff tersely reported 'improvement.'
*A fact that has spread well beyond the confines of panda reserves. The Urban Dictionary includes an entry for 'panda penis' (meaning a small one) submitted by a contributer named Lew. Lew's usage example reads: 'That girl said Matthew Reed had a panda penis.' It is Urban Dictionary policy to reject definitions that include the full names of non-celebrities, leading one to assume that the panda slur was directed at some sports or entertainment figured named Matthew Reed, and not Matthew Reed the wedding photographer, or Matthew Reed the assistant professors with the research interest in the interaction of quinoid compounds with cellular macromolecules, or any of the thousands of other 'Matthew Reeds' on Google."
22 June 2009
panda panky
jason sends us this sleazy phone pic of two pandas mid-thrusting-action. he reports he found it in the guardian this week, though i am not sure of the context.
08 April 2009
pandas have infiltrated my life
and i am finding them all over my computer
though before that i found them all over the world
that is how it goes
this is a weird graffiti message at a late night bookstore sierra & i wandered into in the mission:
though before that i found them all over the world
that is how it goes
this is a weird graffiti message at a late night bookstore sierra & i wandered into in the mission:
21 January 2009
mike birbiglia does pandas
3:15 for pandas, porn, sex, etc:
brought to my attention by long-time panda correspondent ryan!
brought to my attention by long-time panda correspondent ryan!
29 July 2008
porn watching pandas
did you know pandas watch porn? i didn't. the only thing i know about panda sex is this. but animal new york claims it is so. click on the link. you won't be disappointed by the sex face of the lion.
15 May 2008
18+ only kthx
is this video too risque for panda blog?
i enjoy that the only tag for it is "lactation"
and that it linked from our gross panda video.
i enjoy that the only tag for it is "lactation"
and that it linked from our gross panda video.
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